In 2004 I was asked to fly to Wisconsin to spend two weeks alone with my grandfather Edwin to help nurse him back after a fall. The family members were all taking turns, as he lived alone. He was mobile and spry but I was terrified that I wouldn't have anything to talk to him about because he was an old dog and I was a pup. I spent all my summers with him and my grandmother but wasn't close to him as he was always working. The gift that the universe threw at me during that period was one of the greatest in my life. Turns out he and Frank Lloyd Wright were close friends and he was always a young member at the Taliesin who could buffer Frank from fighting with the other dinner guests. He was hilarious, brilliant and always wanted be a stand up comic which was my full time gig at the time, something as shocking as it was bizarre. I miss Edwin the Elder but I had my time sitting in his orbit and for that I am grateful and gleeful. As far as making peace with death, a work in progress is my gear right now. LOVED YOUR POST...
But I don’t want to think in my age now , I’m closed to my birthday ,thank you for the topic , bring to my mind my fathers friend that teach me how to dance and going with me everywhere and was with in my fifteen big party , then he had a fight with my dad ,didn’t see him anymore by that time I was focus only in friends and a boyfriend ,then he start to come in my dreams and I start to looking for him in my visit to cuba, I looking for him so hard and they told me he is dead, he continuous in my dreams to advice me about things and I continue thinking about why I left him , probably the answer is he was old I was with the young revolution , I’m so grateful to him always ,
As you saw in the birthday invitation I sent you, Alex, I turned 90 on 7/21 and feel very much alive. I am lucky, being as healthy and sharp at my age as I am. (Although my memory for certain words has left me at certain times. But I also know that happens to everyone by a certain age.) I love having known you from birth and also being able to reminisce about what it was like before TV became common, seeing Bill Russell playing against Wilt Chamberlain, listening to Jack Benny and Fred Allen and other great comedians on their radio shows. And seeing Sid Caesar on TV when my mother finally bought a TV Oh, and actually seeing Bobby Thomson's home run again Ralph Branca in the 1951 playoffs. I realized when I was in my 50's that I was an ageist and that that was kind of ridiculous. But understandable since we live in a country where only the young and beautiful are regarded as valuable. Other cultures realize that the elders have certain wisdom they have acquired during their many years on our planet. What's important, IMHO, is that one stay open to learning new things and not fearing death.
Man, so interesting how these passing moments of opportunities taken and lost can be so formative. One of the functions of Elder as igniting the call to becoming. The magic of invitation.
It does speak to the two-way aspect of the breakdown in elder - younger relations in our culture. It's not enough to respect / venerate the elders -- they also have to step into the role, as you say.
Really interesting reflexion about the elders and making peace with death Alex !
Was reflecting with my wife some weeks ago about why is that the elder we get, the faster our life seems to pass. At first we thought of kids, but since we don’t have any, the same effect seemed on everyone regardless of kids.
Conclusion was that life seems to pass faster as you get older because you seem to get closer to the finish line ( death ).
Same analogy as in a marathon, when you start running the 26 miles. It seems a lot, then at mile 22 it all seems to pass much faster, so in life.
Anyways, I’m 43 too and making peace with death 💀.
In 2004 I was asked to fly to Wisconsin to spend two weeks alone with my grandfather Edwin to help nurse him back after a fall. The family members were all taking turns, as he lived alone. He was mobile and spry but I was terrified that I wouldn't have anything to talk to him about because he was an old dog and I was a pup. I spent all my summers with him and my grandmother but wasn't close to him as he was always working. The gift that the universe threw at me during that period was one of the greatest in my life. Turns out he and Frank Lloyd Wright were close friends and he was always a young member at the Taliesin who could buffer Frank from fighting with the other dinner guests. He was hilarious, brilliant and always wanted be a stand up comic which was my full time gig at the time, something as shocking as it was bizarre. I miss Edwin the Elder but I had my time sitting in his orbit and for that I am grateful and gleeful. As far as making peace with death, a work in progress is my gear right now. LOVED YOUR POST...
You might enjoy this podcast on elderhood I recorded with Stephen Jenkinson a few years back.
https://youtu.be/Y8xwU-apFFw
But I don’t want to think in my age now , I’m closed to my birthday ,thank you for the topic , bring to my mind my fathers friend that teach me how to dance and going with me everywhere and was with in my fifteen big party , then he had a fight with my dad ,didn’t see him anymore by that time I was focus only in friends and a boyfriend ,then he start to come in my dreams and I start to looking for him in my visit to cuba, I looking for him so hard and they told me he is dead, he continuous in my dreams to advice me about things and I continue thinking about why I left him , probably the answer is he was old I was with the young revolution , I’m so grateful to him always ,
As you saw in the birthday invitation I sent you, Alex, I turned 90 on 7/21 and feel very much alive. I am lucky, being as healthy and sharp at my age as I am. (Although my memory for certain words has left me at certain times. But I also know that happens to everyone by a certain age.) I love having known you from birth and also being able to reminisce about what it was like before TV became common, seeing Bill Russell playing against Wilt Chamberlain, listening to Jack Benny and Fred Allen and other great comedians on their radio shows. And seeing Sid Caesar on TV when my mother finally bought a TV Oh, and actually seeing Bobby Thomson's home run again Ralph Branca in the 1951 playoffs. I realized when I was in my 50's that I was an ageist and that that was kind of ridiculous. But understandable since we live in a country where only the young and beautiful are regarded as valuable. Other cultures realize that the elders have certain wisdom they have acquired during their many years on our planet. What's important, IMHO, is that one stay open to learning new things and not fearing death.
Man, so interesting how these passing moments of opportunities taken and lost can be so formative. One of the functions of Elder as igniting the call to becoming. The magic of invitation.
It does speak to the two-way aspect of the breakdown in elder - younger relations in our culture. It's not enough to respect / venerate the elders -- they also have to step into the role, as you say.
Thanks for doing this.
Really interesting reflexion about the elders and making peace with death Alex !
Was reflecting with my wife some weeks ago about why is that the elder we get, the faster our life seems to pass. At first we thought of kids, but since we don’t have any, the same effect seemed on everyone regardless of kids.
Conclusion was that life seems to pass faster as you get older because you seem to get closer to the finish line ( death ).
Same analogy as in a marathon, when you start running the 26 miles. It seems a lot, then at mile 22 it all seems to pass much faster, so in life.
Anyways, I’m 43 too and making peace with death 💀.
Best
Chris
Well done ! From childhood love to be with interesting elder people